
I caught a bit of Jim Rome’s show while I was eating lunch today. He did a quick take on Carmelo Anthony’s continued resistance to signing Denver’s guaranteed $65 million contract extension. I have no horse in this race, so I wasn’t expecting to have any kind of visceral reaction to the story.
Then, Rome mentioned that Melo closed his defense of his own actions with a very familiar chorus: “I just want to do what’s best for me and my family.”
At that point, I lost my cool.
The “me and my family” shield has become the bane of my life as a sports fan. It is the most transparent, self-indulgent ploy in use among professional athletes today. And it seems they simply can’t get enough of it.
Though I’m sure it wasn’t the first time anyone had used the defense, I believe it first became infamous in 2004 thanks to Latrell Sprewell. Entering the final season of his contract with the Timberwolves, Sprewell felt he was being unjustly low-balled by management on their offers of an extension. He declared in a pre-season press conference, “Why would I help them win a title? They’re not doing anything for me. I’m at risk…I got my family to feed.”
Sprewell, of course, was set to make $14.6M in the final year of his existing contract. The Wolves were reportedly offering a 3-year extension worth between $27-30MM. At the time of the press conference, Spree was 34.
Sprewell was crucified by press and fans for his comment. It’s hard to argue that the heat was unjustified. Nothing will needle a fan base—especially in a blue-collar Midwestern city like Minneapolis—quite like a pro athlete scoffing at a contract worth more than they’ll ever make in their entire lives.
Having seen the backlash against Sprewell, sports agents and players learned a lesson about how not to pitch that particular argument. However, its better-groomed cousin is all the rage. This is due in no small part to the NBA free agent class of 2010, who invoked the “do what’s best for me and my family” corollary more times than anyone with a life would care to count. (If I didn’t even attempt to research it, you know it’s bad.)
The irony of the situation is that in every instance I’ve seen it used, the athlete in question seems more than likely to do the opposite of what’s best for his family. LeBron completely disregarded the mother of his children’s wishes in choosing Miami. He also took less money to do it, and in the process, uprooted them from the only home they’d ever known.
Dwyane Wade turned down a max contract from Chicago despite the fact that long-term child custody arrangements in his divorce have yet to be finalized, meaning his kids may have to split time between South Beach and their mom in Illinois. I can’t find the quote anymore, but Wade said something to the effect of, “You can’t let those types of things get in the way of making the right decision,” when asked about the impact the divorce might have on his choice of team. Which I thought was hilarious. After all, why would you let something as minor as your children get in the way of your decisions about your career?
Carmelo is contemplating turning down $65MM guaranteed with the potential of either a lock-out or a complete financial restructuring of the NBA salary system looming this summer. In fact, recent reports from ESPN’s Ric Bucher suggest Anthony has already made his choice to leave. Depending on how the CBA negotiations conclude, it could end up being a totally fine move. But there’s also a worst-case scenario in which Anthony goes from making just over $20MM next year to making $0 (in the event of a lock-out).
Far be it from me to say I know definitively what’s the right thing for these guys to do at all times. But based on situations like this, it’s hard to deny that there are some real question marks about the family’s role in the decision-making process.
Admittedly, Anthony’s situation is a bit more complicated. He and his wife are both from the east coast (Melo from Baltimore, his wife from NYC). The Knicks are supposedly high on his list of preferred destinations. He has the opportunity to demand a sign-and-trade before the extension offer expires. If he were to manage to orchestrate a sign-and-trade for max money to his wife’s home town (and nearby his own), it would be really hard for me to argue against that.
To fans, though, “doing what’s best for me and my family” has become code for, “I’m preparing to do something completely selfish. It may make me look like a complete snake. But don’t blame me for it - it’s really about my wife / kids / girlfriend. Seriously. How can you be angry with me for that?”
It’s become the mark of the beast—a signal that something slimy is at play behind the scenes. It was only a matter of hours after Chris Paul suddenly dropped his long time representation at Octagon to (supposedly) sign with LeBron and Maverick Carter at LRMR and push for a trade from New Orleans. The telltale sign of the turn Paul had made? LeBron’s tweet to his buddy:
“Best of luck to my brother @oneandonlyCP3 … Do what’s best for You and your family.”
By contrast, Kevin Durant quietly signed an $85MM max extension this off-season. No talk of weighing his options, soul-searching, or doing what’s best for him and his family. In the process, pundits seem to have collectively decided that Durant became the moral compass of the NBA.
Do I necessarily agree with this? No. I believe at a base level that when it comes to your career, you SHOULD be selfish. You SHOULD do what’s right for yourself. You SHOULD take advantage of the opportunities you’ve earned. Depending on who you are, your family may or may not enter into that equation.
What I take offense to is the notion of pro athletes essentially using their families as scapegoats. If they want to do what’s right for themselves—whether money, championships, teammates, a coach, or a different climate are the main motivator—they should go for it. But they should also be man enough to to own up to the real reasons. Otherwise, they can run their statements through as many PR polishes as money can buy—but to those of us paying attention, the sentiment is still going to sound just as ridiculous, just as delusional, just as offensive as Latrell Sprewell did 6 years ago.
So please, for the sake of those of us paying your salaries, just cut the shit. I promise we’ll actually respect you more. If you don’t believe me, compare the public reaction to Andy Pettite’s candid PEDs admission to the wall of crap Roger Clemens hid behind. It may be the only time that I’d recommend any pro athlete in any other sport look to a baseball player for guidance, but trust me, it’s what’s best for you and your family.
-T



